Children are the future.

Slightly more than 12 hours after agonizing about an inability to feel actual happiness, today happened. It was after the roughest night in a while and a hard morning, but then it just worked. I don't know, all the elements came together. Alex did something that started to upset me, but then I just didn't care. I felt like a real person, doing work and leading a real life for the first time in a long time. Not longing to be in another place or another time. Just being here.

And I didn't have a recitation I thought I did, so I am going to go home and celebrate with amplitude.