I got an offer!

They made me an offer I can refuse if I want. Which is at first really great. I mean, now I have a job. I hadn't really been prioritizing, but it was one of my top choices. But the problem is: it's a great offer, but the excitment she had over hiring me inflates my ego and leads me to believe I could get some of the others. It was tied with a few, and I just applied for this Google position I actually have a shot at (it was added to their DB by an employee and I have been told I will have a phone screening though it hasn't been scheduled). It's also a fair amount of money and benefits, but that's not really big enough a deal to make me take it so soon. No one could possibly find reading this interesting.

Argh! I only have 30 days to decide!!?! Am I supposed to tell the other companies so they hurry up the process?

Sometimes I think this world is too big.

Authorama

Does everyone else know about the existence of Authorama? It's a site where you can read (or print) public domain books in full. I don't know if there's much useful on it, but I found it because of this gem.

I got rants in my pants.

1. I have, since returning to this wintery climate 2 months ago, lost: 3 winter hats, three gloves (a pair + 1), one scarf. Of them, I have managed to find the scarf. This is not only leaving me cold, but also a bit sad. One of the hats was this blog's namesake.

2. I just had a "technical" screening. It is impossible to try to impress someone you have little respect for. As it was my second technical screening of two, it left a sour taste in my mouth. If the company wasn't so gigantic, I would probably reconsider wanting to work there. Why was it so ridiculous. Well,

1. He was on AIM. Not only did I know this because he would pause mid-sentence, but he would dictate what he was typing into the window.
2. He said the number one thing he likes about his job (besides money, because it's a job and everybody works for money)...
3. He indicated that he enjoyed travelling in the past to get away from his wife
4. The technical questions were not only easy and 2 in number, but one of my answers led him to ask me for more information, not as part of the question, but because he "just got a Java certification and wasn't sure." Further, the question was not really about Java so much as about a data structure you can write in any language.
5. He ended the interview indicating his client was trying to get in touch with him, so if I didn't have anything further to say...
   Luckily I didn't.

3. I am sick and very tired and don't want to ever do another interview. Or do any of the 1800 things on my list for the day.

Oooh...this seems fun.

Tell me what you think I'm like!

Johari Test

Thanks helen!

Some advice from a cheap pack of Thank You cards, uncut and unedited:

Some Idea Starters for Saying "Thank You"

1. You always do the nicest things.
2. What you did warmed my heart.
3. Thank you for remembering me in such a nice way.
4. Your thoughtfulness was sincerely appreciated.
5. Your kindness meant a lot.
6. So nice of you. So appreciated by me.
7. Knowing it came from you made it even more special!
8. I'm so very grateful.
9. Think about how you would say "thank you" in person, and your sincerity and warmth will come through in your note.

Also to note: for as many logical reasons as this cheat sheet is not ridiculous, all of the "idea starters" are in small caps.

"If you know where you're going, you'll know where you're at."

This isn't a post. Someone just said that in a presentation in one of my classes and I wrote it down.

I guess it's a post.

Who knows?

I assure you that the train of thought that led to this post was infinately positive. Not that this post is negative, but, like The Laramie Project, its hopeful outlook is mediated by sadness.

I was enjoying my night through and through. Got some things done (no homework of course but that's beside the point). I then began walking home and my mind was a blur. All day, I've been having particularly interesting if not scattered thoughts: I immersed myself in the audio soundscape that is Oakland circa 2006, I thought much of improv as I frequently do, ... well etc.

The point is, if you have managed to read this far, that I began reflecting on things I do and want to do. I have a lot of big plans. I can work for this company or that, direct this show or some other, start an improv troupe, build a jam space, record a sitcom, etc etc ad nauseum ad nauseum. But then I thought of all the people (e.g. my acting professor, the lecturer who spoke on film as a global language, Oz Pearlman) who have dedicated their lives to something or another. Sure, I have a lot of ideas and things to say, but on too many subjects. I can play DDR and improvise songs and develop an IT architecture and perform card sleights but I never give anything my all and so there is always someone doing it better. Caring about it more. Someone who inspires me, but only until I get bored.

This all works into a general realization. When I first came back to campus, I was well-received by those who missed me and those who love me. I was introduced by reputation as well as name to those I had not met. But I am no celebrity. I am not someone to listen to. I'm washed up. I'm a CMU has-been. I am living in the past. All I do is think about what used to be, what could be, and occasionally complain about what is. The Royal Society, the cooking club, fencing all help me look toward the future, but it is a future that is doomed to an inevitable end in May. My time at this school feels over; I've done what I can do and am left as the old man with a lot of stories.

But maybe it just means that this is really the time for me. I love college and CMU and Pittsburgh, but maybe it really is time for me to say good bye.